no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
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