your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
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