I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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