She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Randomize
