as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize