Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
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