just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
Randomize
