He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
Randomize
