i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
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