This girl is more easily done than said...
kristin has been a bad kristin
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
