She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
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