I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
I take back everything I said about communal showers
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Randomize
