i think my tv is drunk
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
