He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
