Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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