She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
Randomize
