Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
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