no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
