i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
Randomize
