I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
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