how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Randomize
