I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
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