i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
Randomize
