im gay
i know
yea but for you.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
