Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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