none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
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