So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
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He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
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Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
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