I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Randomize
