the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
Randomize
