Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Randomize