All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
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