I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
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