bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
I believe in your delicious
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
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