i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Randomize
