And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
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