Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
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