Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
