All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Randomize
