Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
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