My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize
