All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
He felt like a one man threesome
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Randomize
