Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
Randomize
