i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
Just pee around me
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
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