Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
you didnt know i had herpes?
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
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