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this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
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