one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
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