just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
