Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Randomize
