I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
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