I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
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