At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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