I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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